graveling: (enshadowed)
Angel [OC] ([personal profile] graveling) wrote in [community profile] ph_logs2024-12-05 10:18 pm

[OPEN] Moving

Who: Angel and Y'all
What: Moving Day and the Surrounding
When: Early December
Where: Yeah!
Warning(s):

1. So take your shaking bones
Eddie leaves on the ferry on a cold misty autumn morning, and Angel spends longer waiting for him to return to the farmhouse than it'll admit to afterwards, keeping a kettle warm on the stove for afternoon tea until the water's all boiled away and it's clear that how many lumps Eddie takes in a cup is irrelevant now, irrelevant ever again and Angel still doesn't want to admit it until it has to.

It has to.

And taking care of the farm, the bees and the temple all by itself just isn't going to be possible, it's not, even if its heart was hale and whole and beating in sync with Eddie's still, so something has to give.

Something has to.

Angel decides that it is going to move.

There are appointments with town hall to discuss possible new houses and apartments and townhouses (not homes, yet), and discussions of its beehives being transported into town, and paperwork to be filled out in a heavy, stiff, blocky hand as it figures out the work of transition, hoping that living in the city will be a replacement for the bustle of clucking hens and the nagging goat and it's going to need to get a stable situation set up for Arcadia, if the horse will forgive the relocation.

Angel is alone.

This is not work to be doing alone.

And that's before we get to the process of packing, of sorting through the debris of a life and a love and the twinge that reminds it that it can't cry every time it comes across a favored book or a shirt that still smells like Eddie, and that twinge is deeply painful enough to make it stop moving for seconds, perhaps minutes before it finds something to push it past inertia, even as it feels like some vital spark inside it is guttering and dimming.

This is not work to be doing alone.


2. And step out on your own
A sign on the bulletin board:

HELP WANTED MOVING. STANDARD PAY OFFERED: PIZZA AFTER WORK COMPLETE



3. Oh, the winter never stops
[This is your wildcard. It was meant for you.]
abhorrently: (path.)

[personal profile] abhorrently 2024-12-06 06:08 am (UTC)(link)
"Of course there is."

She'll stand in the front entry for hours if she has to. They're the same kind of stubborn.

"Something happened."
abhorrently: (when.)

[personal profile] abhorrently 2024-12-06 06:18 am (UTC)(link)
Her arms remain around her corpse-brother, and she says nothing. How can she, when neither of them can cry? If it was a fight, a division apart, there wouldn't be this emptiness around. The same sense that dwelt in Tayrey's house, in the Starr home, in Erin's house - when someone leaves. There is no shadow of true grief that crosses her, for she barely knew the man, but the sorrow is for Angel, who must bear up the burden of being here now.

Time passes, who can say how long. Only that they exist, breathing and not breathing, living and dead, one heart beating, one silent.

Finally, finally, in a voice as soft as snowflakes.

"Tell me what you need."
abhorrently: (truth.)

[personal profile] abhorrently 2024-12-06 09:40 am (UTC)(link)
".....okay. But if you figure it out, tell me."

She pulls back enough so that they aren't bound to this space, but if it seems disinclined to move, she'll nudge them both towards sitting somewhere. Giving Angel somewhere to collapse.
abhorrently: (dawn.)

[personal profile] abhorrently 2024-12-06 08:59 pm (UTC)(link)
And he can fall, and he will be caught, across her lap and in her arms. Grief may flow, and he doesn't need to do anything to be allowed to feel it. Her hand comes up to smooth his hair, hoping it brings some small comfort.

No words, for now. Only when they are needed. But right now, he is protected - no one can or should ask anything of him.
abhorrently: (curious.)

[personal profile] abhorrently 2024-12-07 04:43 am (UTC)(link)
"What's the alternative, though? Detached and lonely?"

Her words are soft, hand still petting his hair. Rich words from the woman who was claiming she can't put down roots, but she figures he can call her on how much of a lie all that was when he's not being crushed by the weight of loss.

"You'd be trading one kind of pain for another."
abhorrently: (discuss.)

[personal profile] abhorrently 2024-12-07 05:26 am (UTC)(link)
"What made you change your mind here?"

Remember. Remember why you tried. Remember why you advocate for it.
abhorrently: (hold.)

[personal profile] abhorrently 2024-12-07 05:41 pm (UTC)(link)
"You still can be. You still are."

Gentle, gentle as snowflakes.

"Getting attached to him was not a mistake, Angel. Neither was building your home."
abhorrently: (breath.)

[personal profile] abhorrently 2024-12-07 06:37 pm (UTC)(link)
"I know."

Which is why she's here to hold him as he mourns, as he bleeds from wounds that cannot be stitched closed and weeps with unseen eyes.

"It hurts like nothing else."
abhorrently: (soul.)

[personal profile] abhorrently 2024-12-07 11:01 pm (UTC)(link)
"Yes. Of course. I'll stay as long as you need."

It's an easy thing to promise, since nothing she has to do save work cannot be moved elsewhere. She'll stay. The house will not be solitary.
abhorrently: (Default)

[personal profile] abhorrently 2024-12-08 02:52 am (UTC)(link)
"Things will begin to get handled. But it won't be neatly tidied up like you think it might. It's going to take longer than you think but less time than you think possible."

One of those contradictory emotional things, after all.