salt water & sadness

[heatherbythesea]

Who: Heather Harne (heatherbythesea) & Anyone who comes across her
What: the depression has her
When: March-April
Where: the beach

She slumps in the surf, still, save for the sporadic shuddering from a silent sob.

Heather's hair hangs heavy across her head, laid limp on the land as she languishes.

And in sorrowful silence she yearns for the sea.

Comments

[heatherbythesea]

There's a shift, when he touches, and a lock of hair slides downward as she turns her head just enough to expose one dark eye. And then she shrugs, not trying to dislodge his hand but just not caring if it slides off or not.

She sniffles.

But she doesn't tell him to leave.

[theydrewfirstblood]

John accepts the answer given in silence--and doesn't move his hand. It sits there as he does: warm, quiet, still.

...at least, until another, meatier thump rings out and he huffs peevishly.

"Ow! Goddamnit, Bao, don't smack me."

Grrrrrrr--*thump*

The furry bunny body is back. Bao is sniffing the woman's hair, then just settles by her shoulder, where John's hand remains. Soon, a sound begins that's akin to a purr as Bao begins to chitter soothingly in contentment.

"She likes you. I find animals are a good judge of character." he explains softly. "Her name's Bao. I'm John."

[heatherbythesea]

Part of Heather wants to push the bunny away -- wants to curl up further and wait for John to walk on. But it's too much effort, and if neither of them want to go, then they'll insist, and that might mean talking.

Talking is dangerous, especially when she's so emotional and her control is so frayed.

She swallows hard, bites the inside of her cheek to ground herself with the pain. Control.

"Heather." she says, clipped and short, in answer. But even that will be accompanied by the sensation of choking, numbing sadness pushed on those who hear it. The mercy is that the emotional bleed-over doesn't last long.

[theydrewfirstblood]

The unfortunate fact is that John is already suffering similar feelings--but they come in waves, and he has some measure of comfort in his family and his animals. That sudden surge...yeah, it doesn't feel like it usually does.

The source of that sorrow makes it easy to put two and two together.

So, as he breathes through the sudden knot in his throat, as it subsides, he gives her shoulder a gentle squeeze.

"It's okay--I understand. I was involved with someone who could control memories. You got something going on like that with your voice, you don't have to say anything if you don't want to...but I'm okay if you do, whatever happens as a result. I know what I'm getting into. If you wanna keep a leash on it..."

He moves his hand from her shoulder to gently tuck his fingers loosely into her hand.

"Basic. One squeeze is yes, two is no, three means it's not a 'yes or no' thing. First, I felt that--how sad you are. If you can't get past how that feels, I get it. If you can...is there anything I can do that'd help you feel better? Even a little?"

[heatherbythesea]

Heather squeezes John's hand twice. No, she doesn't think anything can help.

She knows that her voice can push her emotions on to other people. It can compel them to obey her, and if she puts enough power behind it, force them to do things they normally wouldn't do. A strong will can resist the fae magic of the compulsion, and Heather -- still remembering what it was like to be human -- generally doesn't try to push past resistance. (Older fae, or those who never started out as changelings, usually don't have those qualms, and Heather has seen the damage they can do.)

In better times, she will compensate. She knows American Sign Language, has used it since she was a baby more or less... but it takes effort. And effort is...

Well, she's sprawled out on the beach and not caring that she's partway in the tideline. The sorrow in her makes everything feel too heavy.

She takes a breath, steels herself, and says, "Not human. Stuck."

A caged, angry beast paces beneath the wave of sadness this time -- perhaps it stirs something similar in John, emotions linked to memory as they are.