crushed_pearls: (Default)
crushed_pearls ([personal profile] crushed_pearls) wrote in [community profile] ph_logs2024-06-07 10:58 pm

[Business Opportunity] The King Is Dead...

Who: Anyone!

What: A mysterious new building has appeared

When: Early June

Where: Near the tram station

Warning(s): None


OOC Note: One, only one, character may claim ownership of what is to be revealed to you below. Whomsoever does will become an Entrepreneur, complete with the usual benefits such as immediate upgrade to Job Level 3, though there are, of course, some conditions. This opportunity has already been bought and paid for by the conspirators, and now made available to you! Read on…

It happens overnight. An unoccupied home near the tram station, unremarkable but for its sorrow, is replaced by a low and rectangular building with false crenellations, flying an odd flag that flutters in the near-Summer breeze. It is sturdy, made of wood and stone - how was it built so quickly? - and has a large dining area visible through wide windows. A counter, bedecked with gleaming cash registers, separates the kitchen from the public, concealing the activities within, though one might get a look at the new cooking equipment through two smaller sliding windows that can be approached from the outside, but lock from within.

Come inside. Explore. See the menu boards above the counters, with names like Whopper and Bacon King next to hand-painted pictures of burgers and fries, chicken sandwiches, even sandwiches that use fried fish. The current prices are set under the names with little hand-carved wooden tiles, varnished and shiny; more are in a case on the counter, permitting whomsoever will come to own this place to change their prices. If you dare to explore the kitchen, you will find it fully stocked, with the iceboxes packed with what needs to be frozen, a bread oven for the making of daily bread, prep tools and a setup for frying in oil. In pride of place is a massive grill, ready to toast buns, meat, and perhaps even vegetables, but almost as obvious is a thick and crudely-bound portfolio of recipes that explains, in easy detail, the creation of buns, fries, onion rings, the recipes for everything shown or described on the menu, and offers suggestions for the only missing detail (drinks) in accepting language that frankly, without judgement, explains the advantages and drawbacks of decisions such as including or excluding alcohol, the challenges of potentially carbonating various juices, and emphasizes in no small terms that supplying coffee or tea may make a killing selling to the miners on their ways in, and out, of work.

There is also a set of regalia, complete with a mask of gilt bronze and inbuilt crown of gold, far more valuable in times past than it is now in these desperate days when an ounce of gold will buy you nothing but regret. It rests on a stand behind the counter, and before it, upon the counter, are two things: a sign in red that reads READ, YE WHO ENTER HERE, and a letter. The letter reads thusly:

Hail, good people of Pumpkin Hollow, and be welcomed to the sovereign domain of the Burger King. Know that these hallowed halls are sacred in a desolate and unwholesome land known as America, and welcomed all - prince and pauper, killer and saint, fool, genius, and philanthropist - to partake of their affordable and speedy hospitality. Glory to the Burger King, and glory to His ironclad decree: Have It Your Way.

Yet, the sovereign crown of this dominion lacks one with the fortitude and graciousness to bear it. Read closely, for there is great opportunity and great obligation before you. Whomsoever takes up the regalia and visage of the Burger King shall gain his power and majesty, including power over this place, the proceeds thereof, and the land upon which it is built which is spacious enough to include a garden or be otherwise used for the benefit of this most holy realm. To retain these blessings, however, one must prove oneself worthy; the Burger Kingdom must be opened to the public to do business, serving breakfast, lunch, and dinner, for a period of not less than seven days, during which they who desire the power of the Burger King must wear the regalia. You will be watched; you will be judged. Should you prove worthy, you will be granted the deeds to this realm, in accordance with the following conditions:

FIRST - None may bear the mantle of the Burger King unless they might also bear the love of the Mothers, for the building of this sanctum is dedicated to Serranai as an act of holy creation and abundance. In commerce too are we connected, and that connection is sacred.

SECOND - The power of the Burger King is tied to His mantle and regalia, which must be worn no less than twice a week when He holds His court. The first court held each week is for the benefit of His employees, who may air their ideas and grievances with no fear of reprisal; the second shall be held for the benefit of the community, who may do the same. A king with no followers is merely a madman.

THIRD - The Whopper, and French Fries, must always be available for purchase during business hours. These menu items may never be replaced.

FOURTH - No guest who keeps to the laws of hospitality shall be turned away.

FIFTH - Justice and fair wages for the employees of the Burger King.

Failure to comply with these conditions shall be met with a vengeance as inevitable as it is incomprehensible, along with the stripping of the deeds and the appointment of a new vessel for the Burger King, praise His flame-broiled burgers in their sublime glory.

Heavy is the head that wears the Burger Crown. We look forward to your reign.


No staff attend the fully stocked building. If there are any unseen watchers, it must be someone among those who have come to investigate this place. It is ready to be claimed.

Will this be your new kingdom?
skeletonkeay: (pic#17045663)

[personal profile] skeletonkeay 2024-07-13 05:11 pm (UTC)(link)
"Nah, I'm just lookin'," Gerry agrees. He may have been raised by a murderer, but it didn't happen in a barn. He knows about food safety in restaurants. Plus his eyes tell him more than his hands would. The most he touches is the handle to the walk-in, to take a peek. So this is where food service employees come to have their mental breakdowns.

Once his exploring is concluded, he lingers behind Max to watch the master work.
maximumcake: (Default)

[personal profile] maximumcake 2024-07-15 01:19 am (UTC)(link)
"That's fine. Just try to make sure you keep your hair pulled back, too, okay?"

Max never flipped burgers for minimum wage, but he did work at a coffee shop in college. They didn't have a walk-in freezer so he had to do all his crying in the pantry. You'd never know it from the way he moves behind the grill. With the instruction manual propped up in front of him, he builds the burgers step by step, and he makes the entire thing look like a conductor directing his orchestra.

"Okay, order up! Two Whoppers with everything and two medium fries."

skeletonkeay: (good mood)

[personal profile] skeletonkeay 2024-07-27 01:20 pm (UTC)(link)
"Ah, true." Gerry has a method of twisting his hair so tightly that it stays in a bun all on its own, which he quickly enacts, then stands back to watch Max cook.

Damn, he's good.

"Hell yeah, thanks, man." He takes his own meal. "I think the last time I had Burger King was a few days before I died the first time... That was years ago now. I ever tell you I died in the States? I was in Pennsylvania, on a field trip for work."
maximumcake: (head scratcher)

[personal profile] maximumcake 2024-08-02 12:25 am (UTC)(link)
Max eyes him with such envy. "Okay, when I grow my hair out as long as that, you have got to teach me how to twist it into a bun. That was awesome." Right now his hair is in that awkward growing stage where it's too long for short styles but not long enough to put in a ponytail yet. He is suffering.

"Um. I think you mentioned the book you were in but...Wait, how did you get killed on a field trip?"

skeletonkeay: (u rang?)

cw: cancer mention

[personal profile] skeletonkeay 2024-08-02 11:26 pm (UTC)(link)
"Oh, I had a brain tumor." He says this so casually, like it's the most mundane thing in the world. "Didn't know about it till the seizure, but by then I was done for anyways."
maximumcake: (head scratcher)

cw: cancer mention

[personal profile] maximumcake 2024-08-09 02:41 am (UTC)(link)
"U-uh, I'm... sorry?" That feels like the kind of thing you should say about getting a brain tumor but he's so completely thrown off by how casual Gerry is being about the whole thing.
skeletonkeay: (cheerful)

[personal profile] skeletonkeay 2024-08-22 10:20 pm (UTC)(link)
"It's alright. I didn't notice. Thought it was just tension headaches. An eye can't see inside itself, I guess." He shrugs. "Surprised it wasn't my lungs! I figured if any part of my body was gonna get me before the horrors, it'd be the lungs, but what can you do."
maximumcake: (wary)

[personal profile] maximumcake 2024-08-29 01:54 am (UTC)(link)
"Because you smoke so much?" He can't help it, Erik instilled in him a pretty big bias against smoking in general. Vampires and their sensitive noses.

"I mean, I guess if you had to die it's better for it to be quick and painless. But how did you go from that to being stuck in a book?"
skeletonkeay: (weary smile)

[personal profile] skeletonkeay 2024-09-02 08:53 pm (UTC)(link)
It wasn't exactly quick or painless. While it wasn't a long and drawn out battle over weeks or months, it did take hours, which was plenty for him, thanks. But he won't bum poor Max out anymore.

"Oh, that happened after I died. Someone had to use my, uh. Well, my skin, to make a leather page with the story of my death written on it, and then bind it in a book with other, similar pages."
maximumcake: (pic#14146334)

[personal profile] maximumcake 2024-09-05 11:50 pm (UTC)(link)
"Your skin?!" Max blanches. "Why would anyone do that?"