Her mothers, alive. Keaton, who'd never left home. Her colony, thriving in a way it never had the chance to. The haze of a dream smothers the rest of the details, but she can take guesses: Rat, alive and her friend more than her brother's; Needles and Keaton together, probably; her own old friends never sent off to war... new friends, able to come by.

"...yeah," she breathes, resting her whole head on her arm, hair dangling over the back of the chair. "Except add in the fact that if I actually let myself think about it in detail for too long, I feel like— like I'm just going to lose it. And I don't— I don't have time for that now any more than I had time for it every other time I was teetering on an edge in the last few years."