Gods, does he get that. The way he nods, emphatic, like they've simultaneously arrived at the correct answer to a complex jump calculation -- it's not just understanding. It's acknowledgement of a bone-deep truth: the worst will come, and no matter how much you've prepared for it, it will still land like a hammer blow.

"I try to think about Picon the same way," he says. "But... all I have of it is such a small piece, you know? It was easier when there were at least a few other Pican survivors around. We could fit all the smaller pieces together to get the full picture. But now people here ask me about it and -- I don't know what to say. I can tell them a little, but not everything. Do you ever feel like that?"