"...It's changed a bit, the longer I've been here," Jon adds, reluctant. "I've managed to keep things under control for the most part, I like to think, but it seems like every month that passes, it feels less like a tool on a utility belt I can use when I need it that has some quirks, and more of an... itch."

He's been avoiding talking about it at great lengths, and even for Neil, this is likely the most admission he's had about it in some time - he knows full and well that it isn't something that makes sense, but something about speaking about it put it at the focus of things, like it wasn't something he could simply try not to do.

"The longer I go without getting information from someone, the more exhausted I become, and the stronger the itch gets. Even if it hasn't been an especially long time since the last, I've... found myself pulling information tied to past terror from people in otherwise polite conversations. The more time that passes since the last instance, the... more justified in doing so I feel in the moment, after I've pulled myself back."

Finally catching himself rambling, and making a bleak subject bleaker, he clears his throat gently.

"If you thought this world was strange, some of the things I've heard would leave some of this feeling like little more than a bizarre dream," He tries to joke. "Strange and terrible worlds are out there, apparently."