"I can't justify what I did, but I can certainly explain why I did what I did. Part of it was the result of old habits. I struggle to resist the offer of a contract, and what Tiamat claimed to offer was tempting- a one-time use of immense power."

"When I arrived on the ship, it was just after the ghosts had been let out of the engine, so there was a lot of talk about dwindling resources. In the Constant, we've all done things were aren't proud of when resources get short, and I've never been afraid to be the villain if it means accomplishing what I need to. I planned to earn the trust of as many people as I could, then turn around and threaten to loose Valdis upon everyone when the time was right. I was hoping that the combination of fear and betrayal would generate enough fuel to buy everyone some time. I even tried to consult the Captain about how to best deploy such a plan, but he called me a fool and wouldn't give me a minute of his time. And of course, I was a fool to trust Tiamat. In the past, my patrons have been incapable of lying outright, and somehow I completely missed that not all entities would be the same way. Even so... I never intended for Valdis to suffer like that, and I recognize I was wrong for thinking I could put her free will aside for what I saw as the good of the ship. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong."